Season 3 Episode 10
Effective Communication in Relationships: A Guide to Mental Health and Hormone Conversations
In this insightful season finale of The Flow State podcast, hosts Monica Grohne and Norah Candido welcome Dr. Nevin, a relationship coach and holistic practitioner, to explore the nuances of communicating about mental health and hormonal changes with partners. This episode offers practical strategies for fostering understanding and connection in relationships, particularly around sensitive topics like mental health and hormonal fluctuations.
Understanding Emotional Triggers
Dr. Nevin breaks down the anatomy of emotional triggers in relationships:
- The triggering event (what actually happened)
- The emotional response (how you felt)
- The behavioral response (how you reacted)
- The story we tell ourselves (our interpretation)
She emphasizes that understanding these components can help couples navigate challenging conversations more effectively.
The Nervous System's Role
A key insight from the episode is understanding how our nervous system affects relationships:
- Our system scans for safety/danger four times per second
- Past experiences influence current perceptions
- Understanding our triggers helps regulate responses
- Self-regulation is crucial for healthy communication
Communicating About Hormonal Changes
For women experiencing hormonal fluctuations, Dr. Nevin suggests:
- Being specific about timeframes when support is needed
- Explaining that changes aren't personal to the partner
- Clearly stating what kind of support would be helpful
- Reassuring partners about the temporary nature of intense periods
Creating Safe Spaces for Vulnerability
The discussion highlights several strategies for building trust:
- Asking "Can you hold space right now?" before difficult conversations
- Allowing partners to decline conversations when not emotionally ready
- Scheduling important discussions for appropriate times
- Creating predictable support systems
Breaking Down Communication Barriers
Common challenges addressed include:
- Fear of being labeled "too emotional"
- Shame around expressing needs
- Difficulty articulating feelings
- Partner resistance to emotional discussions
Practical Communication Tools
The episode offers several actionable strategies:
- Name what you're experiencing specifically
- Explain how long you expect it to last
- Share what support would be helpful
- Acknowledge it's not personal to your partner
- Schedule check-ins for important conversations
Moving Forward Together
For couples looking to improve their communication:
- Start with self-awareness and understanding your own patterns
- Practice naming emotions and experiences clearly
- Create systems for having difficult conversations
- Build trust through consistent, honest communication
- Allow space for both partners to process and respond
Key Takeaways
The episode emphasizes that effective communication requires:
- Understanding your own emotional patterns
- Creating safe spaces for vulnerability
- Being specific about needs and timeframes
- Maintaining patience with the process
- Building systems that work for both partners
Remember: While opening up about mental health and hormonal experiences can feel vulnerable, creating clear communication channels strengthens relationships and builds deeper understanding between partners.